Saturday, July 27, 2013
To help my two year old, Sam, go to sleep, we often have to lay down near or next to him. Sometimes we will rub his back, other times we just have to lay there being present. Sometimes it's a bit of both. There are times when you are with him for more than 30 minutes and times when he is out pretty fast (usually more toward the 15-30 minute side).
Today I took some time to watch the kids while my wife, Amy, got her hair cut. It was in the middle of the day and I was working, trying to get some important things done for work, but my wife deserves the time out to do this. So I took a break for a bit to take care of the kids - mostly just Sam and George (7 months old). Honestly, I was a bit anxious because I was really trying hard to get this specific project done for a meeting and I wasn't going to be ready if I spent all my time watching the kids. I know, I know...
Anyway, part of my duty was to put Sam down for a nap. He did not want to go and dropped to the ground. I picked him up while he screamed and cried (this is not unusual for Sam). I carried him into his room and put him on the bed. He wanted to get up, but I said no and I knew this time might be a hard one and would take a lot of time. Well, one of my tricks to get him from stopping screaming and crying is to get him to the opposite by making him laugh. So I started tickling him and playing with him. He stopped crying and screaming and suddenly there was that awesome smile and big dimples all over his face. He can be such a sweet, cute boy when he is happy.
I had the urge to just hold and hug him, so I bent down and gave him a big hug. And he laughed.
I rose up and looked at him and he said, "more". So, for the next few minutes, we repeated this over and over with me hugging him and him saying, "more" each time and each of us laughing, until finally I told him he needed to sleep and that I would lay there with him.
As I laid there and watched him calm down and go to sleep so peacefully, I was overcome with gratitude and love for my little boy. What a gift he is, like all of my children.
Then, as I thought of our little exchange a few minutes before, I was struck with the word, "more". it repeated itself in my mind over and over.
This little sweet boy wanted more. more love. more laughter. more happiness. more time. more of me.
So many things in life say the same thing. more. And too often I find myself giving more to too many of those things. Work, food, TV, and so many other things that end up, at the end of the day, distractions. Most of those kind of 'more' are not really 'more'.
But this little boy? Not a distraction. No, he is really more. He is joy.
I have been taught all my life that "...men are, that they might have joy" (2 Nephi 2:25, The Book of Mormon). If that is indeed our purpose, then that is what we should want. When we feel it, see it, know it, we should not just say, more. We should scream it - with the way we pay attention to it, work toward it, and devote our lives to it.
Well, today, I experienced joy. MORE!