I've been thinking about writing this for a long while.
Sometimes I guess you just need time till an idea settles enough and your
feelings are balanced enough to where writing things like this are ok.
To be clear up front, I mean no ill intent or insult or
offense to anyone with what I write here. This is simply my thoughts on a
difficult subject. Also, those who know me best will know that nothing I write nor
any opinion that I hold sways my love for other people, regardless of how they
believe or act. All people are God’s children to me and my brothers and
sisters. Some are harder to love than others at times, but I do love them all.
This said, let’s talk…
I grew up in the Boy Scouts of America. I participated in
Scouting beginning at age 8 as a Cub Scout and continued on, rank by rank, year
by year, till I achieved the rank of Eagle in 1991. Eagle is the highest rank
you can achieve as a Boy Scout and it is a difficult thing to earn. I was 16
when I earned mine. Although my progression in Scouting ranks ended then, I
continue to be proud to be a Boy Scout and have served since as an assistant
Scout master and as a Scout Master and as a merit badge counselor for other
Scouts.
Scouts is one of the sweetest experiences and most
influential activities I participated in and continues to influence and guide
me.
There is no wonder why every young man would want to participate equally
with others and why every father wouldn't want to also share that experience
with their sons. In fact, that sentiment hits very close to home for me. My
father spent a full week of his limited time off one summer to go on a 50 mile
backpacking trip in Lassen national Park when I was 15. It was one of the best
experiences I’ve had with my father and I am very grateful for his sacrifice
and personal attention to me during that week.
So, when the issue of Gays as members of Scouts began to
arise and swell as a controversy, I thought long and hard about the different
arguments about it, and reached some conclusions that I think are not being
addressed enough – especially by those for allowing gays in the Boy Scouts.
First, The Boy Scouts of America is a private organization
and the US Supreme court has upheld their right to not allow gays into their
organization. I agree with that ruling. Our constitution and our Country’s
whole foundation is built on rights of ownership, privacy, and separation of
church and state. It is a foundation built on allowing people to have their own
beliefs and organizations. I think it very important that we preserve those
rights and that a private organization such as BSA should be able to restrict
membership in this way.
Second, I do not believe this is a gay rights issue. There
is no right where there is no right – and the Supreme court has already upheld
that there is no “right” to join a private organization. If there were, then
they could force a church, for example, to baptize a person into their church
who clearly was not obeying the conditions of what the baptism requires, etc.
Third, I DO believe this is an issue of appropriateness,
safety, and attraction. Stick with me here…
It seems to me that gay advocates sometimes tend to act as
if gays do not suffer from the same human frailties as heterosexuals and that
somehow because they are gay, they are perhaps “harmless”, or above the
terrible things heterosexuals do. It is a subtle thing, but I think if you take
time to think about it, you will see in media and in the argument for gay
rights, that there is a certain “righteousness” assigned to gays.
The fact is, however, that gays are still (obviously) sexual
beings. And, if they truly want equal treatment, then they should have to
adhere to equal reasoning with their sexuality. What do I mean? Well, take your
school gym classes, for instance. Would you want your male gym teacher hanging
around in the girls’ locker room? Of course not. The idea is a scary one,
right? Well, WHY is that scary and wrong? Because you know that men who are
heterosexual, have attractions to females and female bodies. Those attractions
are very strong and can influence even some good men to do terrible things –
meaning that there is a chance that they will act on that attraction and cause
harm to your young female child.
So tell me…are gay people immune to such powerful
attractions? Are they immune to making
such mistakes? No. Of course not. But I think sometimes our media and the gay
community attempt to paint themselves as such. They would never claim Jerry
Sandusky and others like him to be part of their “gay community”. No, they are
just predators. Yes, they are predators and bad people. However, they obviously
had gay attractions that they could not resist and control.
When a heterosexual man abuses a young girl, I also want to
separate myself from the idea that I could be the same as he is. And in some
ways I am the same – I surely have physical attractions and impulses. However,
I have trained my mind and body and emotions over many years to control those
impulses and even put them quickly away or even never consider them. How do I
do this? I protect myself by preparing structure/habits in my life that teach
me to think differently, to have control over my flesh, and to spiritually fill
myself with light that does not allow in troubling thoughts and feelings. I
have trained with scriptures, experience, repentance, and other important tools
that help me be now very different from those men who do such bad things.
But how do we protect our children when they are away from
us? How do we protect our “community”? In the same way. We create structures
and rules and habits that prevent situations from occurring where such terrible
things could occur. We create ways where such events could never even happen
(at least that is the hope).
The Boy Scouts of America just happens to be one
organization that has unfortunately experienced some terrible things within its
ranks. The Boy Scouts did not make those things happen. Our whole nation, for
many years has been ignorant and slow to act against crimes against children
and women – especially cases of abuse and such. We see tragedy in many places –
schools, churches, and sports teams. These are very visible organizations and
places, so they tend to be publicized and prosecuted heavily for not protecting
their members, their players, their students. It is unfortunate when the acts
of individuals betray the very values and mission of the organization and cause
such harm to the direct victims and the indirect victims (other members, etc).
So we see these organizations react and work to protect.
Trust me, I have witnessed the many, many changes in the Boy Scouts to help
both protect the Scouts and the organization. Not so they stay out of trouble
(although it helps), but because they want to preserve something valuable for
those who still want to participate. They have seen the benefit of what they
provide to people just like me and they want to continue providing that for
others – because it does make a difference.
So now the gay community wants to participate in Scouting. I
understand. I really do. Scouts is awesome. But, if we consider the reasoning
of what it means to be gay, then I would say it should not and cannot be
allowed to happen. Being gay means to have same-sex attraction. Just like a
heterosexual man is attracted to a woman, a gay man is attracted to a man. Just
like a heterosexual man could be a sexual predator in a girls’ locker room, a
gay man is then also a potential predator in a men’s locker room. It is an
issue of attraction. I don’t want my young sons in a locker room with young
women. NO WAY. Why? Is it because they are girls? Well, yes. But anatomy is not
the problem – attraction, and the weakness of flesh IS!
The fact is, we never know WHO is going to be a predator,
who is going to simply make a terrible choice and be susceptible to strong
sexual impulses. So we put rules in place. We separate by attraction – not by
anatomy – that’s just been the normal argument. Let’s face it, Adam and Eve did
not even know they were naked in the Garden of Eden (for those here who are
religious) until they were allowed to fall and could be tempted by their flesh
and such.
Anyway, regardless of religion/beliefs, this issue is about safety
of our children. It is about creating buffers between the weakness of men (all
men) and our children. If we allow gays to participate in scouts, mixing with
other boys, then you are essentially mixing them with young women, which would
be inappropriate at those ages.
So, if the argument is about equality, then lets argue true
equality based on the truth of the matter. This is NOT about sexual preference
as if that were simply a skin color or heritage. It is a sexual attraction
issue. Period.
I get that the argument could be made that the same rules
that keep boys safe now would keep them safe with gays in the organization, but
it would certainly greatly raise the likelihood of an issue – just like mixing
a girl or two into a troop would.
Ultimately, I think BSA will allow each chartered group to
decide for themselves what they will allow, but I would not be in favor of it –
and not because I don’t want gays to participate in Scouts, but because I want
to protect my own sons and the Scouting program that I know. I am afraid that
the raised risk would eventually be too costly to manage.
I am sure that there are more complex issues at work here
and other arguments that could be made, but for me, it is simple.
My stance is not because I am homophobic. Not at all. I am
afraid – or rather concerned and aware of the power of sexual attraction – of any
orientation. And to pretend that a gay person is not as sexually motivated or
influenced as someone else is to tell a lie, and I am a Scout, And Scouts are honest.
